Faith over Fear

Hey! It's me, just talking about the mind again.

I had a weird end to 2014. Weird may not be the best word to describe it, but I'm going to go with it. Leadership is hard, it's really hard, because it shows us ourselves and I found myself running head first into MYSELF the last few months or so. I love being stretched and learning new things and having what I previously believed challenged and all that comes with it. But, come on. My Narnia people, you know in the Last Battle when they reach the new Narnia and the unicorn keeps saying come further in, further up! closer to the King! I had a lot of further in, further up this year. 

It's weird, but then somewhere along the way, I thought too many hard things now, too many hard things ahead, too much going up. And I just kind of .. stopped. It was fear winning over faith, but hey, a girl gets tired every once in a while. Amen? Real or not real is exhausting. Filtering words and actions through the armor of God is draining. Running through the ringer and exposing all that ick just flat out takes higher strength. Further in, further up is a tough climb. Can I get an amen? Leadership is hard? TRY BEING HUMAN IS HARD. All defenses are down and it's very, very confusing. Isn't it, though?

Is it possible to back out slowly in your own journey, hands feeling for the exit? 
yes, yes it is.

Cue the mind.
You all heard me talk about Unbroken in my last post. That story stirred something in me that I think I was so desperate for. You all heard me go on and on about the raft scene (THE BEST). There was something Louie said and believed on the raft, as him and his friends were floating into desperation and uncertainty, not knowing if and when rescue would come. He believed that no matter what happened to their bodies, no matter what happened physically (sunburn, lack of food, no water, sharks), they must not lose control of their minds. It was a muscle, he believed, that would atrophy if left idle. 

So, they told stories. All kinds of stories. Asked questions, all kinds of questions. Shared memories, all kinds of memories. Because Louie believed the mind was the key to survival. If you lost that, you lost everything. 

And then this, 

"Though all three men faced the same hardship, their differing perceptions of it appeared to be shaping their fates. Louie and Phil's hope displaced their fear and inspired them to work toward their survival, and each success renewed their physical and emotional vigor. Mac's resignation seemed to paralyze him and the less he participated in their efforts to survive, the more he slipped. Though he did the least, as the days passed, it was he who faded the most. Louie and Phil's optimism, and Mac's hopelessness, were becoming self-fulfilling."

Keeping the mind going, light and free, well it has more weight and impact than we know. It welcomes in hope. It keeps going, even when you don't feel like it, and brings the rest along with you. It is survival. I don't claim to know much, but I do know that. Fear kills the mind. It shrinks it and makes it cold. 

BUT THERE IS GOOD NEWS. 

The mind can be restored with even the tiniest of steps. 
Fear can be killed with even the smallest of efforts.

A dear student gave me a bracelet for Christmas. 
It says life is a journey.
Then another friend on Christmas Eve noticed it and said me too. I'm learning that too! He said don't you just want to build a nest right where you are and stay there? But isn't God saying, hey let's keep going? He was speaking for him but I was hearing for me and I heard him.

And that small, thoughtful gift and that small, thoughtful moment .. I'm convinced it changed everything. 

I want to choose faith over fear this year. 

This journey is tough, but I want to fight the good fight. I'm tired, but I want to shed apathy and spring forth courageously. I want to keep learning, yet feel rested. I want prayer to kill pride. I want all the things, but most importantly I think I want standing with interlocking shields in a close defense alongside others. 

I want to stand, stand firm, after the battle.

So I say to you what is sometimes hard to say to myself. 
YOU CAN DO IT. I believe in you so much! You can do this hard thing and your hard thing and all the hard things and you can do it because God is with you. In front, beside, and behind. Let me whisper the reals, that choosing faith over fear is the sweetest and most powerful. Oh, how rich your journey is! Oh, how mysterious life is! 

I am proud of you. I believe in you. Let's do faith over fear together this year.
Onward!